criticize with love.

In the first Reading of the Acts of the Apostles, we listen to how Paul does the things that many of us love to do--criticize.
Paul criticizes his fellow Jews. He confronts them about the hardness of their hearts, about their rejection of the Messiah, and the killing of the Messiah in their own hands. It was indeed a difficult mission.

But Paul was driven into this criticism of his brother Jews, because of his one and only intention: He wanted them to discover the truth and to discover life. His criticism was an invitation for them to become better persons.

This is where we probably fail. Much of our criticism is done out of love. Much of our criticism is borne out of hardness of heart and selfishness.

Mind you, it is quite risky to criticize. It can pose as health hazard. It could pose threats to our business. It could destroy beautiful relationships in friendship if not properly handled. Yet, Paul was not afraid to destroy even his friendship with his fellow Jews because of a good ulterior motive- he wanted them to be converted!

Let us ask ourselves: “Are we afraid to criticize?” “Why are we afraid to criticize?” Is it because we are scared to risk our friendships, risk our businesses, risk or relationships? But let me remind you my dearest people of God, that there is nobody who can do it to our friends and loved ones except ourselves who can do the criticism with love and understanding.

On the other hand, we are also taught how to receive criticism. Many of us, when confronted with our limitations, block them out by saying, “I did not do that.” or “How dare you tell me such.” We defensively counteract, “Who gave you the right to criticize me?” “I have so many things to throw against you also.” Or we rationalize, “Everybody is doing that, why are you picking on me?” or worse, “Be careful with your criticism because I know what you are doing in the underground.” My goodness! I am afraid there is no end to all of these word-war exchanges.

But certainly, we can put an end to all of these if we can only acknowledge in ourselves that part of evangelization is the humility to accept criticism constructively, the awareness of the acceptance that we are not perfect, the humility and compunction of heart to accept criticism and the courage to deal with our weaknesses and finally grow humbly from it. Then and only then we can achieve successful and effective dealings on criticism.

If we are truly disciples of the Lord, two things are asked of us today. First: be able to criticize with love, so that in the process we can lead our loved ones and friends to conversion.
Second: humbly accept criticism in the spirit of openness and love. We must be willing and ready to accept that something in us needs to be corrected, that we should change, that we need healing and, finally, that we need people, our loved ones and friends to remind us of this. So, to reiterate and wrap up my thoughts from today’s Readings, I must say: we must learn to criticize with love and we must learn to accept criticism with humility.

Blessings to us all!