Does God hold grudges?

It's 9:20Pm.
I couldn't sleep as my energy level has not subsided from my whole day's driving and my runny nose, which I got from one whole day's exposure to the freezing weather outside, is keeping me awake.

I went to Sta Fe today to do the weekly grocery shopping for my community with my assistant shopper Brother Paul (Vietnamese). I should have been asleep now if not with this colds that I guess I caught while going in and out the car for stops in grocery stores for the shopping.

I thought of starting my laptop and as I was cleaning up my cookies and temporary internet folder, I accidentally clicked on one of the icons on my desktop and it opened up! Gracious! there was internet access! (our system admin may have overlooked the router) So I thought of putting down into writing my thoughts and reflections (before I again forget to write it down) that I gathered while driving the whole day with brother Paul.

Let me start by re-telling you a brief story about Joseph in Genesis. His story runs this way.

Jacob had 12 sons and one of them was Joseph. The 11 sons were jealous of Joseph because he was Jacob's favorite. So one day, they brought Joseph to a secluded place intending to kill him. But on their way to the wilderness, they chanced upon a caravan buying slaves. They decided to sell Joseph to become a slave in Egypt. The 11 brothers of Joseph went back home and upon seeing their father, told him that Joseph was killed by a lion and as proof, they showed him Joseph's shirt which they smeared with blood.

The 11 brothers stayed with Jacob in Israel, while Joseph stayed in Egypt. Famine overcame Israel, forcing the Israelites to go to Egypt where Joseph had become the second highest official. Joseph's brothers saw him and were frightened that he might take revenge on them. They pressed upon Jacob to ask Joseph not to take revenge on them.

Actually, it never crossed Joseph's mind to get even with his brothers. Because from the start it was clear to him that he would never hold grudges against anybodyfor he believed that everything happened according to God's plan.
We are like the 11 brothers, and Joseph is like God.

After we confess our sins, we remain afraid, anxious that God is keeping grudges against us. We go to confession and ask for God's forgiveness, yet we still harbor doubts.

We say we go to confession to cleanse ourselves from the dirt of sin, and then we continue to ask ourselves, "Am I really clean already?"

Well, let me tell you what I know about God. God does not hold grudges. He forgives without any conditions. When God forgives, he also forgets. When God forgives, He also erases our faults; and when God forgives, He also takes away the mounds of sins in our souls. That's what I know about Him. Does He hold grudges? Not at all.If you have been touched by God's forgiveness, if you have sinned and have been forgiven, then, the Lord tells us in the Gospel, "you must publish it. You must proclaim it. You must tell people how good God is." The Lord tells us in the Gospel, "What you have received in private, you must proclaim from the rooftops."

If we have been recipients of God's goodness, if we have been forgiven of sins we thought could never be forgiven, if we have enjoyed God's favor that in spite of our faults...sins...crimes... God still looks at the light in us, then we should tell other people about it. We should tell our loved ones, our workplace, our communities and even our our enemies, "God is so forgiving, look what He has done to me. God is so kind, behold what he has done in me. God is so compassionate, look at me, look at the changes. Look at the miracles God has done in me.

Let us pray my friends for that grace. We all have been forgiven but unfortunately, we are not all ready to fully accept that forgiveness; we are not always ready to tell other people how God is to us and we are not always ready to say that God does not keep grudges on me.

May you have a blessed moment as you reflect on this sharing of my thoughts.
Its 10:20Pm already and I can sense now that my eyes are getting ready to welcome a sound sleep after an hour of reflections on the Book of Genesis (37: 5-11). Goodnight and bless you all!